An Anniversary of Sorts

This week marks Splitcat and I's fourteenth year together. Our official wedding anniversary will be in September and will celebrate our 12th year of marriage.


How did the Chintzibobs first meet?(I think I've talked about some of this previously, but this is the complete story)


My first real recollection of meeting splitcat was when I was 14. I was playing my flute at my youth pastor's wedding, and splitcat was a groomsman. He was almost 20. He says he remembers me from the rehearsal when someone told him I liked poetry and he remembers me standing in the hallway talking.


I would occasionally see him at Metro Bible Study at Mount Paran North. But I will here admit that it was his friend with the skater hair that tended to catch my attention. Anyway. I would see him around town at concerts and stuff. Then right before my 17th birthday he was a groomsman in my sister's wedding. We did not, however, walk down the aisle together. He says he did not recognize me at first but thought I was growing up well once he knew who I was.


Later that summer I saw him while on my first and only date in high school. I went with a guy in youth group to Innerseeds, a christian rock festival in Atlanta, we went to see his best friend who was in a heavy metal band. We were walking around the grounds and I saw Splitcat walk by. I was surprised when he gave me a nod of recognition. I think I smiled back. Then after we had walked past, we both turned around and looked back at one another.


That December, he graduated from college and moved back home. It was my senior year of high school. For reasons I've never gotten a good answer for, he started coming to my church every Sunday. He had a lot of old friends there and had once attended with his family. He started working with my brother-in-law and hanging out with us and attending Young Adults, where my parents were in charge and I was always around. I think it was a month before I finally heard him speak. We both liked Daniel Amos, so that gave us a starting point for conversations. Oddly enough, we quickly became friends. I, being the 17 yr old I was, of course developed a huge crush, but I knew it was better to be his friend. Plus I was embroiled in a three year unrequited love mess at school. So I got over it. But meanwhile I was going to a bible study for young ladies on the Proverbs 31 woman, and the leader was encouraging those of us who were unmarried to pray that God would reveal our husbands to us at the right time.


That time came sooner than I expected. It was the night of my brother-in-law's 25th birthday. Sam, the dog, was having some potty issues, and I was the designated dogwalker. Almost everyone had arrived, and Sam needed me again. We were standing in the middle of the front yard when splitcat pulled up in his tan hyundai. When he got out of the car and started walking up the driveway it felt like forever. I don't know any better way to explain it. I didn't hear an audible voice or anything, I just knew that I would always be there to meet him. I struggled with this feeling for some time after that. I hard a hard time believing it. I was not in love with him and our friendship was continuing to grow.

Then my brother-in-law decided to stick his nose in my business. But I guess I should thank him, because otherwise things may have turned out differently. Several months had gone by and I was slowly falling in love, not just having a crush. My b-i-l took it upon himself to inform splitcat that I might be in love with him and to be careful since I was so much younger. I remember this occasion well. We had been bowling and I usually rode with splitcat, but when we were leaving I was forced into my sister's car while her husband rode with splitcat. I was peeved. I knew I had been manipulated, but I didn't know why.

So then, my seemingly ever-present b-i-l decided that this other girl was perfect for splitcat. I believe the reasoning was that she liked to read. He sent them on a walk at a retreat and they all went canoeing down the hooch. Was I jealous? A little. But she and I were friends so on a different retreat(perhaps the worst retreat ever-but for other reasons) we talked about it. I told her I wasn't sure of my feelings, but not to let me get in the way if she was really interested. I'm not really sure how the whole thing fizzled out, but it did. The girl moved on to marry the boy with the skater hair. So it all worked out ok.

But because of my b-i-l's interference, splitcat began to consider me in a different light. He attended my final band concert where I performed a solo( a whole song!) and he came to my graduation.

Then came that fateful day. It was the 4th of July party for our church, held, ironically enough, at the previously mentioned girl's family home. It was a day of softball and fun. And it changed my life. We somehow ended up alone in the living room. Splitcat said he needed to talk to me. Anytime someone says that to me, I panic. He told me that it had been brought to his attention that I might have feelings toward him and he wondered if that were true. I kind of equivocated, not sure where the conversation was going. I told him that yes, at one time I had feelings for him and left it open as to my current feelings. Then, much to my surprise, while I was waiting for him to say, I'm sorry, but I don't think of you that way, he said he really liked me and wanted to know if I would consider dating him. I was completely floored. I may have even cried. People started coming in the house, so we went outside to a quiet spot. I told him I would love to date him, but because of our age difference he would have to talk to my parents, but it was a definite yes from me. And thus began what I call "The Summer of the Mosquitoes." While we were sitting talking we were attacked by hundreds of mosquitoes, but neither of us wanted to leave.

He spoke to my parents and they gave us their ok, but we decided to not tell anyone right away. It was strange to think of ourselves as a couple, I think. Our first unofficial date was to Innerseeds. The same event from the previous summer where we had turned to look back at one another. It was outside, and we got bitten by lots of mosquitoes. Our first official date was about a week later, almost exactly 4 yrs from my youth pastor's wedding, where he first remembers meeting me. We went first to Oxford Too. A used bookstore in Buckhead(sadly, it no longer exists). Then he took me to Cafe Intermezzo, a dessert place. When we were leaving, he checked the time to see if we had time for one more thing, and we did. And he took me to a park on the river. It was a beautiful night, a fog was rolling in off the river and it was late enough to be cool outside. We could hear the horses across the river. And, of course, there were mosquitoes.

I apparently used the word "crap" one time(oops! now it's twice), and that was the extent of my impropriety.

36%

That is somewhat disconcerting. Perhaps I should learn to shoot a gun and start stockpiling food.

Happy Birthday to me!

Tomorrow is my birthday. I actually keep forgetting.

We had our party yesterday. I think it went well. Our final tally was 17 children between the ages of 3 months and 12 yrs, and 8 adults (let's just say we are all over 30 and under 40 :)). It was nice to see everyone. We all spent today lounging around. I was going to try a new church, but I have a nail in one of my tires.

Happy Birthday to my Sister!!!

Recital

Today was the big recital day for the girl. We watched nine groups of little girls do tap and ballet routines. Our little girl did a tap dance to Rockin' Robin. It was very cute. Her outfit had all the things little girls love--sequins, feathers, and fringe. She does not have stage fright.

I am glad it's finally over. It was a lot of work getting everybody ready. She has short hair, but it still had to be in some sort of bun. I got it all fixed with the feather hairpiece, and about half an hour later as I was getting ready, she came to me with it in her hand because her brother had decided to pull it out. It put me way off schedule having to redo her hair. We made it just in time.

Next week is VBS. I am looking forward to it. Every summer I consider trying to find a VBS for every week to keep everybody occupied. But I'm too lazy to get out that much to drop off and pick up.

It's been a mostly quiet week. Everyone is better. At last. We spent one day at my sister's, that was fun. I'm hoping to convince splitcat to let me go to the movies tonight. I need some alone time. W. has decided he doesn't want to sleep, ever. And when he finally crashes, it has to be in your arms, and if you lay him down, he wakes up. The only exception is at bed time. But he usually wakes up at least once a night. M. is sleeping like a champion and taking great naps. My only complaint is that he still likes to wake up at 4 am for breakfast. So between the two of them, I am generally up 3 or 4 times a night.

I guess that's it.

Is it over now?

Well, we've all finally had it. Thankfully I only had a mild case of fever. Splitcat got a pretty good fever, but no throwing up.

So far today the children are doing a good job of keeping themselves entertained. I think we are going to cook out this afternoon. Yesterday the smoke was really terrible again. So far today it's okay.

I've been experimenting with my novel, changing from first person to third. It's helpful from a word count stand point, but I am undecided if it is better or not from a reader's view.

And to all my local friends, we are thinking of having a get together the weekend of June 23 since my birthday is on the 25th. Email me or splitcat if Sat. or Sun is better. My sister informed me it was my turn to host the party since I have a big yard. So the 4boydads are of course invited and the Longeneckers, too--if you read this. If 4boymom can think of anyone else(how about your sister?) let me know. And of course my dear sister and her family.

If you need more notice we can try in July, it's just usually hotter.

Have a good Memorial Day and remember to spend a moment reflecting on what today really means.

Poor P.

I was going to write an account of the last day of kindergarten, but he didn't get to go. He got the bug last night. I felt so bad for him, but he feels too bad to care right now. E. had a wonderful last day of school. She's totally worn out. They played in the water and had an ice cream party.

It's been a good year for the boy. He loves to learn and loves school. I am proud of the way he has learned to handle himself. When I would ask if he had a bad day he would tell me yes, but he didn't remember why because he only remembers the good things. I hope he has really learned to let go of the bad and embrace the good. He's a great kid. I am really enjoying watching him become a person.

Dorcas Smucker over at Life in the Shoe posted this link today and I had to share it, since splitcat and I are both introverts.

Caring for Your Introvert


Update: I took the babes to the dr. W. also has an ear infection. but they seem a little better today.

Untitled Lament

I think I have mentioned before how most days I feel like I'm treading through ankle deep mud. Today I have been wading through vomit. Baby vomit. The boys have picked up whatever the girl had, but they've been sick since this weekend and also have diarrhea. I will be giving the dr. a call tomorrow. They keep pretending to get better, then after eating perfectly fine all day, I get a lap full of partially digested formula. The fevers have abated, but their other symptoms have not.

I do seriously feel as though I am under attack from you know who. I read this yesterday about the enemy's attacks from Priscilla Van Sutphin

He will attack every relationship trying to bring division between people. He will try to discredit you in the eyes of others. He will try to keep you sleepless so you get tired and run down. He’s send pestilence so that you have to get busy cleaning up the mess from that. He will do ANYTHING HE can when you are supposed to be intimate with HIM, to try and destroy your time with GOD. You may thing those little irritations are just coincidence. THEY ARE NOT ! They are to test your peace, and steal your joy, and to try to make you tired so you don’t have energy to do the will of God, or to be intimate with Him, then he will unmercilessly attack you for NOT doing those things, trying to condemn you. (for the full thing click here)

Apart from the viral pestilence, we've had another ant invasion(I do take responsibility for the crumbs on the floor, but not for the drought). I found a different type of ant bait that came highly recommended and we've had a steady stream of ants for 2 days. Apparently word has spread among the colonies that there's good eating. I feel a little like a mass murderer seeing all these tiny little ants scurrying like they've found the mother lode, but ants do not belong in my house.

So anyway, Priscilla's word really caught my attention.

All I can say is my novel better sell really well to make up for all the crap I've had to go through every time I start making progress. --But as splicat always reminds me--

James 1:2-4:
2Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,
3knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.
4And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete lacking in nothing.

On another subject--I was reading my Bible the other day and doing the random flip and stopped at Jeremiah 10 and came across this verse:

Jeremiah 10:12 But God made the earth by his power, he founded the world by his wisdom and stretched out the heavens by his understanding.

First of all I am still astounded that I come across wisdom and understanding everywhere I turn since this is what I am writing about. But this verse really caught me off guard. How did He "stretch out the heavens by his understanding?" I just couldn't make it make sense. So I did a little research into the language of the verse and found in Strong's that there were several meanings for the original word--(here's the full entry)

understanding, intelligence
the act of understanding
skill
the faculty of understanding
intelligence, understanding, insight
the object of knowledge
teacher (personification)

The word skill suddenly leapt at me. And when I looked up other scriptures with this word, many of them were describing the artisans God appointed to build the temple or others skilled in some sort of creative craft.

Therefore, we see that he stretched out the heavens by his skill. It gave me a picture of God as an artist carefully crafting the universe.

What really amazes me is that he has given me full access to The Spirit of Understanding(Isaiah 11:2) through the blood of Jesus. I John 5:20 We know also that the Son of God has come and has given us understanding, so that we may know him who is true. And we are in him who is true—even in his Son Jesus Christ. He is the true God and eternal life.

So, anyway, this is a little of what I've been thinking about. There's a lot more to it, but I just realized it is late, and I should try to get some sleep.

Please keep lifting up my family in prayer. You have no idea how much I appreciate it.

Congratulations!

I just want to send a Hoorah to Val for placing in the finals at the ACFW Genesis contest in the sci-fi/fantasy/allegory category.

I know she's excited. Good Luck Val!

Oh, what a night

I was woken up last night an hour earlier than the usual 2:30am cry-fest by the girl crying. This usually means she needs to go to the bathroom but isn't awake enough. So I got up to carry her to the bathroom before she peed all over herself and her brother, who was in her room with permission. Unfortunately that was not her problem. She had thrown up all over the chair in her room. I grabbed her and told her to get in the bathtub and got splitcat up.

This is my worst failing as a mother. I cannot cannot cannot deal with vomit. It took every ounce of self control I had not to add to her mess. I stood in the bathroom heaving while I rinsed her off. I finally grabbed my bottle of spikenard scented lotion and stuck it under my nose. I couldn't even look at her. Splitcat dealt with the other mess. This morning he said it was the hardest thing he had ever had to do as a parent.

I don't know why I can't do vomit. I have no problem with baby spit up, dirty diapers or diarrhea.

Of course with all the commotion the babies woke up. Oddly enough, the boy slept through it all even though he was in the midst of the action.

So please say a quick prayer for the girl, she has a temperature this morning so she has to stay home from school(I could use some prayer for that) and say a blessing for splitcat for being such a stand-up dad. I don't know what I'd do without him.

At around four-thirty, for reasons known only to himself, the boy woke up, went back to his room and started yelling at his sister for being in his bed. Which, of course, woke up the babies again.

I've had to give Baby M some puffs of his inhalor since the air quality is so bad from the wildfires in South Ga. So he has been whining and sleeping extremely lightly. Nothing is making him happy.

It could be a long day.

Kisses

baby w gave me a kiss today. I had him in my lap at the computer and when I turned him around to face me he leaned over and gave me a kiss. I wasn't sure if he meant it, so I kissed him back, then he giggled and kissed me again.

baby m is finally crawling. Well, it's sort of a frog hop and crawl, but he can move pretty fast. They go for their 9 month check up thursday. It's hard to believe they are 9 months already. Their first birthday is looming around the corner.

Swinging

I took the kids to the park today. We had a mostly good time.

Here are the twins on their first swing ride at the park.

Wedding Memories

The girl and I watched my wedding video this morning. She had been looking at my pictures, and I thought, Hey, I've got video of that! She liked it and found some white shoes and a white ballet skirt for a veil and had a wedding. It was a nice moment between us after an awful awful day yesterday.

I hadn't watched my wedding in a long long time. I forgot how thin I was. It's like a dream. It was somewhat sad when I realized how many people in my video are no longer with us. And I cried when we repeated our vows. It was a nice day. Here is me on my wedding day(note:to anyone who thinks I look good and might want to stalk me--I don't look like this anymore, it's been 11.5 years and 4 children since this was taken.)

Ironically, the people I'm talking to in this picture are splitcats two former love interests.



In some ways I did not recognize myself. In other ways I am more like my former self than I have been in a long time. I disengaged myself from my emotions some years ago for various reasons. Now I am relearning how to have emotions without becoming physically ill(that's how I got so skinny) and how to have emotions without them ruling my actions.

I am nowhere near the wife and mother I once imagined I would be. I hope to be that someday, though. Splitcat keeps reminding me to take small steps, not giant leaps. For every step I take forward I seem to take a step and a half back sometimes. But I continue to plod ahead through the mud, through the rain, and through the good days. I am ready for this dark night to be over. But I think I still have more to learn and unlearn before that happens.



I have noticed lately a change that the Lord has begun in me back to parts of my former self. I had become desensitized the the things of the world over the past 13 years, and lately, I am finding so much that offends me as a Christian. And so many things that make my heart break. I hope that this means that I am reaching the place where there is more of Him and less of Me.

Well, that's interesting

While splitcat was putting the children to bed last night I was downstairs trying to get M to go to sleep. I stood up to rock him and glanced out the window. There was a police car with lights flashing. Hmmm, I thought, that's interesting. There are police cars across the street at fairly frequent intervals. The most shocking was a few months ago when I looked out the window and saw a cop with his gun drawn and aimed at three teenagers. I found out later that a neighbor had called the police because they were shooting a gun in the back yard(which is very unsettling when you have 4 small children). This neighbor is trying to get them out of the neighborhood. She had encouraged me to call the police if we have any trouble. My biggest complaint is that they take up the street when their employees park in the morning and they let their dog out all the time. When they first moved in they would have loud pool parties. Anyway. The police have been there quite a bit. So I wasn't too surprised until I looked the other way and saw several other police cars. Then I saw several policemen leaving the house and they had on a lot of gear. Great big helmets, heavy bulletproof jackets. And one was carrying one of those odd looking small battering rams. I ran upstairs and got splitcat, he surmised it was a drug raid. I kept an eye out, but I didn't see much but the police going in and out. I didn't see if they arrested anyone, and they were gone in about two hours. They also had a big van they kept taking equipment out of. I want to know what happened. I'm hoping the aforementioned neighbor knows. Her brother-in-law is a cop. I suspect it is the teenage boy that is in trouble. We live in a pretty decent neighborhood, so it is somewhat disconcerting to have the police frequenting your neighbors house.

Baby M

It didn't seem fair to have a video of W without doing one of M. So here he is at five o'clock this morning. You'll notice that he is very aware of the camera and what he's supposed to do. I've always wondered how they know they are supposed to smile.

New Things

Trying something new. We have a new internet connection so I can do more fun stuff now. Here is baby W last month as he was just starting to try to crawl. Isn't he cute?

Oh No!

For the last month baby w. has been diligently honing his crawling skills. He now crawls wherever he thinks he needs to go. It has taken him approximately 2 days to go the next step. He can pull himself up. He doesn't want to sleep. He wants to crawl or stand up. He's quite a busy fellow. Fortunately his brother stays where you put him. For now.

In other news. We will soon be upgrading our internet service, so I won't have to worry about using up the phone lines and will hopefully blog more.

There's a whole lot of teething goin' on

P. has lost his two front bottom teeth. One is already halfway in. Yesterday, W got his two bottom teeth in. So I have 3 teething children. Poor little M's aren't nearly there yet. P. has been chewing on his shirt collars.

We've done a little mixing up in our house this week. We finally had enough of the bedtime fighting between P and E, so she's back in her own room and the babies have moved in with P. He likes it better. But I have an even bigger mess than before while I try to get everyone's belongings switched. The babies are in clingy mode, so I have been having to work with a baby in one arm. I haven't gotten much done.

I started redoing my bedroom over spring break. I'll post pictures at some point in the future. It went from really dark green to a light gray-blue.

Tonight P. made a special album. He's been really intrigued by the few baby pictures of him I have in a photo album, so he found an empty photo album and drew some of his favorite memories. It was very sweet. He had his first day of school. Visiting the "newquarium" and the "newseum," camping, and several others. His class at school had a book published. They each did 2 pages. I almost didn't get a copy because I had no idea what it was, but I am so glad I did. He's very proud of it. He still wants to be an author and illustrator.

The babies are trying to crawl. It is very cute. W. is almost there, M is trying. W. wants to explore everything by himself, but M. wants to view the world from my lap. He'll lay on the floor and cry, and as soon as I put him in my lap he's grabbing for everything in reach. Life has been so much better since we've been feeling better.

Spring Break

It’s been a busy spring break. Splitcat and the boy went camping. I painted my room(when it’s all put together I’ll give you the before and after photos). Today we did nothing.

The twins are trying really hard to crawl. W. is almost there. He can get up on his hands and toes. M. just started to get up on his knees and rock. W. has become quite roly-poly. He’s going to be a handful.

P. put on a movie for us tonight. He created backdrops and characters. It was about astronauts and aliens involved in shootout. Only the blue astronaut survived. Then E. did a one-girl show. I’m not quite sure what the story was about, but it involved someone she called “Boy” and a Bible. She was wearing her underwear, high-heeled plastic shoes, a panda purse, a headband worn as a necklace, and she was speaking into a microphone from LibbyLu. The best parts were the various poses she struck while talking. They’ve really gotten into writing and illustrating their own books. We give them all the paper they want.