Guess Who Can Reach the Kitchen Counter! OR Another Exciting Unplanned Visit to the Doctor

For my husband's version go here

Here is my version

It was a typical day trying to get everyone out the door to take P. to school. I issued orders to wait at the top of the stairs while I got my shoes and P. some socks. While looking frantically for the previously mentioned items, E. started screaming. Since she screams about everything, I assumed she was just mad. It sounded like her "P. just took something from me" scream. So being the loving mother that I am, the first words out of my mouth were, "P.! giver her back my purse!"(cause she was holding my purse, and now she wasn't) He handed it back to her, but she was still screaming and rubbing her eyes. As I approached the unmistakeable scent of orange cleaner wafted through the air. Sigh. Yes, she sprayed herself in the face. Later in the day I questioned both children, because I realized that P. may have done it. But E. said he didn't.

I am typically calm in an emergency situation(unless it involves vomit or roaches), so I quickly stripped her and threw her in the tub. I ran water down her face for a couple of minutes, then ran and phoned the dr. They gave me the number for poison control. The atlanta poison control people are very nice. I was relieved to hear that the cleaner she used was not caustic and would not burn. But I was told to flush her eyes for another five minutes and to call back if they didn't show signs of improvement in 30 minutes. Then the man told me how to flush her eyes.

I had to wrap her tightly in a towel and lay her in the tub. Then I had to pour tepid water over her eyes. This sounds easy. But a 36 lb 2 yr old is a formidable foe. It also didn't help that all I kept picturing in my mind as I poured water in her eyes, was a framed picture of Ophelia by John Everett Millais. This was heightened by the fact that I had kept the water running and a loose toy was preventing the water from draining. I was concentrating on keeping the water out of her nose and mouth, so I saw the water rising, but wasn't overly concerned until she suddenly starts freaking out(well, freaking out worse than she already was). I guess it hit her ears. At this point she also managed to free her legs from her towel wrap. Have you ever given a cat a bath? This was a similar experience. And it hadn't been anything like five minutes. Once I got the tub drained, she laid relatively quietly again.

I was impressed at how well she took it. She even kept her eyes open for me. So when the phone rang(the nurse at the dr. office) I decided we had all had enough. I don't ever want to do that again. Thankfully, she hasn't held it against me. But that night she kept whimpering in her sleep. I told my husband that she was probably dreaming about me drowning her.

A not very quick trip to the dr. revealed no lasting damage, but they did a cool test where they put dye in her eyes and used a black light to see if her eyes were scratched. Thankfully, they were not. A trip to McD's soothed all our souls.