An Anniversary of Sorts

This week marks Splitcat and I's fourteenth year together. Our official wedding anniversary will be in September and will celebrate our 12th year of marriage.


How did the Chintzibobs first meet?(I think I've talked about some of this previously, but this is the complete story)


My first real recollection of meeting splitcat was when I was 14. I was playing my flute at my youth pastor's wedding, and splitcat was a groomsman. He was almost 20. He says he remembers me from the rehearsal when someone told him I liked poetry and he remembers me standing in the hallway talking.


I would occasionally see him at Metro Bible Study at Mount Paran North. But I will here admit that it was his friend with the skater hair that tended to catch my attention. Anyway. I would see him around town at concerts and stuff. Then right before my 17th birthday he was a groomsman in my sister's wedding. We did not, however, walk down the aisle together. He says he did not recognize me at first but thought I was growing up well once he knew who I was.


Later that summer I saw him while on my first and only date in high school. I went with a guy in youth group to Innerseeds, a christian rock festival in Atlanta, we went to see his best friend who was in a heavy metal band. We were walking around the grounds and I saw Splitcat walk by. I was surprised when he gave me a nod of recognition. I think I smiled back. Then after we had walked past, we both turned around and looked back at one another.


That December, he graduated from college and moved back home. It was my senior year of high school. For reasons I've never gotten a good answer for, he started coming to my church every Sunday. He had a lot of old friends there and had once attended with his family. He started working with my brother-in-law and hanging out with us and attending Young Adults, where my parents were in charge and I was always around. I think it was a month before I finally heard him speak. We both liked Daniel Amos, so that gave us a starting point for conversations. Oddly enough, we quickly became friends. I, being the 17 yr old I was, of course developed a huge crush, but I knew it was better to be his friend. Plus I was embroiled in a three year unrequited love mess at school. So I got over it. But meanwhile I was going to a bible study for young ladies on the Proverbs 31 woman, and the leader was encouraging those of us who were unmarried to pray that God would reveal our husbands to us at the right time.


That time came sooner than I expected. It was the night of my brother-in-law's 25th birthday. Sam, the dog, was having some potty issues, and I was the designated dogwalker. Almost everyone had arrived, and Sam needed me again. We were standing in the middle of the front yard when splitcat pulled up in his tan hyundai. When he got out of the car and started walking up the driveway it felt like forever. I don't know any better way to explain it. I didn't hear an audible voice or anything, I just knew that I would always be there to meet him. I struggled with this feeling for some time after that. I hard a hard time believing it. I was not in love with him and our friendship was continuing to grow.

Then my brother-in-law decided to stick his nose in my business. But I guess I should thank him, because otherwise things may have turned out differently. Several months had gone by and I was slowly falling in love, not just having a crush. My b-i-l took it upon himself to inform splitcat that I might be in love with him and to be careful since I was so much younger. I remember this occasion well. We had been bowling and I usually rode with splitcat, but when we were leaving I was forced into my sister's car while her husband rode with splitcat. I was peeved. I knew I had been manipulated, but I didn't know why.

So then, my seemingly ever-present b-i-l decided that this other girl was perfect for splitcat. I believe the reasoning was that she liked to read. He sent them on a walk at a retreat and they all went canoeing down the hooch. Was I jealous? A little. But she and I were friends so on a different retreat(perhaps the worst retreat ever-but for other reasons) we talked about it. I told her I wasn't sure of my feelings, but not to let me get in the way if she was really interested. I'm not really sure how the whole thing fizzled out, but it did. The girl moved on to marry the boy with the skater hair. So it all worked out ok.

But because of my b-i-l's interference, splitcat began to consider me in a different light. He attended my final band concert where I performed a solo( a whole song!) and he came to my graduation.

Then came that fateful day. It was the 4th of July party for our church, held, ironically enough, at the previously mentioned girl's family home. It was a day of softball and fun. And it changed my life. We somehow ended up alone in the living room. Splitcat said he needed to talk to me. Anytime someone says that to me, I panic. He told me that it had been brought to his attention that I might have feelings toward him and he wondered if that were true. I kind of equivocated, not sure where the conversation was going. I told him that yes, at one time I had feelings for him and left it open as to my current feelings. Then, much to my surprise, while I was waiting for him to say, I'm sorry, but I don't think of you that way, he said he really liked me and wanted to know if I would consider dating him. I was completely floored. I may have even cried. People started coming in the house, so we went outside to a quiet spot. I told him I would love to date him, but because of our age difference he would have to talk to my parents, but it was a definite yes from me. And thus began what I call "The Summer of the Mosquitoes." While we were sitting talking we were attacked by hundreds of mosquitoes, but neither of us wanted to leave.

He spoke to my parents and they gave us their ok, but we decided to not tell anyone right away. It was strange to think of ourselves as a couple, I think. Our first unofficial date was to Innerseeds. The same event from the previous summer where we had turned to look back at one another. It was outside, and we got bitten by lots of mosquitoes. Our first official date was about a week later, almost exactly 4 yrs from my youth pastor's wedding, where he first remembers meeting me. We went first to Oxford Too. A used bookstore in Buckhead(sadly, it no longer exists). Then he took me to Cafe Intermezzo, a dessert place. When we were leaving, he checked the time to see if we had time for one more thing, and we did. And he took me to a park on the river. It was a beautiful night, a fog was rolling in off the river and it was late enough to be cool outside. We could hear the horses across the river. And, of course, there were mosquitoes.