I haven't posted in a while. so I thought I'd give it a try. I've been avoiding the internet the last week or so. I can't pinpoint a real reason, maybe I've been spending too much time on it, I don't know. Since my Sorting post, I've been thinking alot about alot of things. I decided what I am looking for is a life of simplicity. I know that Life will never be simple, but I can simplify the trappings of life. In my baby-step mode, I decided the first thing I would simplify is how many dishes were in my cupboard. So I am down to 4 dinner plates, 4 salad plates, and 4 bowls. Next I will clean out the utensil drawer and keep 4 sets of silverware. Then I will move on to the glasses. Then the childrens cups. Partly it will force me to wash dishes, and partly it should keep my tiny counter space from being cluttered with dirty dishes. The old me would have kept the 12 place settings in the cabinet, just in case(of what? exactly).
I went to a tea party today. It was held at a very lovely house and I only knew a few people. I sat with the hostess and 2 other girls my age. They are getting ready to read the book Captivating and have a bible study. So we talked about Romance and being a woman. It was very interesting, because even though we were the same age, we were at different places in life. There's me, then one of the girls lost her husband in a car accident last spring and is pregnant with her 5th child, and the other girl is unmarried and about to complete her MBA. So it made for interesting conversation. What is interesting is how similar at core we all were in our desires in life. One of the things I've been thinking about in the last few days is Romance. Not as in romance novels or soap operas, but a mixture of the Divine Romance and it's shadows and types on earth. I have considered the question(hypothetically)--if I told my husband I needed more Romance in my life, what would I mean by that. Would it mean I want him to bring me flowers, or take me out, or buy me furs, or just spend time listening to me. I haven't reached a conclusion yet. I think that there is a myth that can be perpetuated that women should consider it romantic if their husband does something around the house for them, or keeps the children, or etc. But that isn't romance. It is certainly a way to show love to your spouse, but it is not romance. I guess I have been thinking more about what Romance is not. And if we have love, do we still need romance?(I think yes). The world seems to equate romance with sex. I definitely don't agree with that.
I think for true romance to occur there has to be an intimacy involved-not physical, but more of a mental/spiritual. My husband has to know me well enough to know what I consider romantic, just as I have to know him well enough. Where I might find a candlelit dinner on my finest china romantic, he might think a picnic lunch on a mountain more romantic. So if I plan a romantic evening and plan it around my likes and ignore what he likes, then am I romancing him or myself?
How does the Lord romance and woo us to Him? By ministering to our individuality. Some may be wooed by God the Father, because they have never known a father's love and that is their deepest desire. Some may be wooed by the sacrifice of Jesus, because the thought that someone loved them enough to die for them stirs their heart. Others may be stirred by the power of the Holy Spirit and be wooed by the adventure His presence in our life promises. Then, after their hearts are stirred towards God there will come a moment when they accept the love He is offering and turn their hearts to Him through salvation. While the reality of who He is and Christ's sacrifice never wavers, every one has their own story of how God wooed them. There is no ritual or formula that God performs to win hearts, because no two hearts are alike. He meets us where we need Him most. And he continues to woo us even after we are His. He sends me thunderstorms to say He loves me because He knows how much I enjoy them and he knows they stir my heart towards Him. To some he sends beautiful sunsets, or the sound of crashing waves. I imagine there is something that each of you can think of that stirs your heart again to where you remember that first rush of love you had towards him. Just as a married couple, past the early days of being in love, have some memory of those heady days that can be stirred by a song, or a smell, or just the sight of their beloved across the room.
These are the memories that can keep us going through the hard times. When we feel that God has forgotten us in the midst of our trials, or when we aren't getting along with our spouse and we wonder what we saw in them in the first place, we have those memories to remind us of how our hearts were once romanced. And in considering that love our hearts can be stirred again.
So think about what things remind you of God's love for you, whether it be something natural or man made, then keep an eye out and watch for it. And the next time you see your spouse, remember what made you fall in love with them and give them a hug(or kiss, whichever you prefer).