Another Exciting Evening

Since I put E. back in her crib I haven't had too much trouble with her at bedtime. Tonight I have been hearing her off and on for a while. Then, of course, the crying began. With P. I knew every subtle nuance of his cries and what they meant. E. has a much more limited repertoire of cries, mostly they're just loud. So when I heard a hoarsely uttered wailing cry, that was not excessively loud, I figured something must be wrong. I guessed she need a diaper change. Well, As I mounted the stairs I knew for sure that she needed a diaper change. I did not expect, however, to find her bathed in blood, as I did. She tearfully told me she needed a wipe. A wipe would be about as useful as the band-aid I gave my sister when she had a tinker toy lodged in the roof of her mouth. It was just a nose-bleed. But she did a great job spreading it all over her face, hands, and knees, as well as her clothes. Fortunately, it had not yet occurred to her to use it as finger paint(since she has used other bodily emissions for that purpose, it's not a far-fetched idea).

Conversation Overheard

While folding laundry this morning I heard the following in the hallway:

"I'm going to go mess up my room. Come on E. You want to help me mess up my room?"

I enjoy the conversations between my children. Especially when P. tries to teach E. words that even he cannot pronounce. He's been teaching her numbers and colors. She may always believe that 11 is pronounced a-wen-a. Oh well. At least he is trying to help her.

The Return of Vaudeville, or Music Soothes the Savage Beast

I have a confession. I put E.'s crib back together. I just couldn't take anymore. Apparently neither could she. She very visibly relaxed when I put her back in. This is the girl who wanted to be tightly swaddled until she was about 8 months old. I guess there is a certain comfort in the confinement of a crib. But we had gotten into a bad cycle of staying up late and not napping. So last night, I put her to bed at 8:30. She was very exhausted. So she did her usually hysterics, but I wouldn't let her out. So I started singing. After a few rounds of "You are my Sunshine" she started to calm. I'm not sure what song came next, but it was enough for her to release her vice-like grip on me and stop crying. I figured I was on to something. So I went into my very limited repertoire of children's songs. If you say a first line, I actually know quite a number of these, but left to my own devices, I can remember about five. At the end of that five she was sitting down. So I launched into my favorite children's church songs. After "Jesus Loves Me" and "Jesus loves the Little Children" I got stuck. Sudden Inspiration!!. "Father Abraham!" For those of you unfamiliar with this classic, it involves ever increasing body motions. She actually laid down to watch the show. She would occasionally grin at my antics. Ok, I thought, time to slow it down(after all, isn't that what happens in a lot of worship services, you sing fast, you sing slow). So I sang "It is well with my soul." Her blinks became heavy. After a few rounds of the previous I got into the chorus of "How Great Thou Art." She took that last breath of relaxation and her eyes closed a final time.

There were two things I got out of this. 1. She was asleep before 9:00 for the first time in over a week. 2. A pretty good little worship time for myself.

It's nice to win sometimes.

Movies

Okay, here it is

Movie meme:
1. What was the last movie you watched?

Besides the Baby Einstein series, I think it was Batman Begins.

2. What was the last movie you bought?

For myself? I have no idea. I think the last movie someone gave me was Pirates of the Caribbean

3. What was the last movie you went to a theater to see?

Batman Begins-which is a great movie. I'm still divided on whether or not Christian Bale is a good Batman. On one hand, he's Christian Bale, on the gripping hand, he was a little more stiff than I had hoped, but stiff in a very Batman way. On the whole, I hope he gets cast again.

4. What is the movie you have seen the most?

Dune(the one from 1984). In high school I watched it(the 4-hr version) every school holiday and at least once a week in the summer. Once I had the books I read them nearly as frequently. I have had to cease my Dune activities because I get lost on Arrakis for at least a week and am totally useless(Ok, more useless than normal). The Atreides take over my mind and I start thinking like them. And if you've never read the books, you won't understand. If you have, you know what I'm talking about.

5. What are the 5 movies you like the most?

Dune
Rebecca
Jane Eyre
Matrix
Pride and Prejudice(the really long one they show on A&E)

6. Tag 5, yada yada.

I tag Because I Said So. I won't tag her for the books though.

Anonymous

Gentle readers (Lisa and Lindsey)

I have fixed my comments section to allow anonymous posts, just in case you ever want to leave a comment.

Blackberries

I skipped church tonight to pick blackberries. I dropped my children off in their respective classrooms, and went to the gym to see if anyone showed up for youth group(where I am a "youth coach"). It was all guys and they were playing dodgeball, the majority of the group is in NY for a mission trip. I wandered up to see if my sister needed help, but she had it under control, so I found some cups and set off on a blackberry hunt.

Blackberries are my favorite. They have a really short growing season, so that makes them that much more special. A few weeks ago we were early for church so the children and I went on a nature walk around the parking lot. To my utter delight, the back parking lot was surrounded by blackberry blossoms. I have been patiently waiting for the fruit to ripen.

So tonight I set forth on a nature walk of my own. It was cool, the air was misty and it was nearing twilight. It was raining in a rather desultory way, reminding me of many summer church camps, walking to and from the cafeteria delighting in the cool splash of rain on a hot summer day. I caught a faint whiff of honeysuckle as I carefully picked the few ripened berries I found. A few feet further I saw that there was indeed some late blooming honeysuckle hidden in the corner. I drank deeply of the scent and allowed the nostalgia of past springtimes to wash over me briefly. I continued my search for ripe berries. I was quite taken with the beauty of the blackberry vines. The mix of red, green, and black. There was a completeness to its beauty.

I realized as I was standing in the rain that I felt utterly peaceful. I was completely alone. I had a thought that maybe I should be thinking deep thoughts about God or praying or doing something generally useful with my brain. But I felt a quiet nudge in my heart that it was okay to not think, but to enjoy standing in the rain pondering the beauty of blackberry vines.

Elmo?

I took my children to the movies for the first time today. I chose to take them to the free movie because, well, it's free(except for the $200 I paid for popcorn and drinks). Our movie choices were Elmo in Grouchland and Garfield. Being the wise mother that I am, I chose Elmo in Grouchland. After all, it's Elmo.

If you know me you may be wondering why my 4-yr old has never been to the movies. I can sum it up in 2 words. Dark. Loud. P. is an exceedingly sensitive child. The mere mention of the word fireworks can send him running and screaming, and it has been over a year since I traumatized him by going to Stone Mountain for the Laser Show. He asked every night for 6 months if there would be fireworks.

So, feeling a dire need to get out of the house, I loaded up my two and my 11 yr old niece, who was willing to sit through Elmo. All is well. We get our snacks. The previews come on. P. is a little scared, but doing ok. He happily munches his popcorn and sips his drink. E. is having a wonderful time eating popcorn. The lights dim, the movie begins. P. ceases all actions and melds his arms to the armrests and his back to the cushion behind him. His eyes widen. But he doesn't say anything. I look over at him from time to time and he hasn't moved. It occurs to me that he looks like a little old man on his first roller coaster ride. Enter the villain. Exit us.

I assumed that the pitiful wail issuing from P.'s lips would disturb the other occupants of the theatre. We made it 45 minutes. E. was loving every minute of it. P. was still crying when we got to the car. A trip to the wal mart to look at the fish hopefully redeemed me.

I've been tagged!!!!!

4boydad tagged me. So here are my answers(with a little bit of info stolen from splitcat).

1. How many books have I owned? (I stole this answer from splitcat and made it my own. I like to make him do all the work)

I don't know. I have about 14 bookcases in my home. They all hold books. Two hold SF and Fantasy, two hold general fiction, two hold mystery/suspense, one holds YA, two hold sewing/craft, one holds non-fiction theology/devotional, one holds a mish-mash of textbooks, anthologies, etc, two hold history and Star Wars Lego models, two hold children's books. And yes, I have read 90% of them multiple times. To illustrate the seriousness of my book addiction. I gave up novel reading for Lent. It was painful, but the Lord really blessed me for being obedient. You can get a lot done when your nose isn't stuck in a book.

2. What was the last book you bought?
The last NEW book I bought was Sunshine by Robin McKinley. But more recently I traded some books at a used book store. I bought a Gordon Dickson, Patricia McKillip, William Sleator, and a few others I don't remember.

3. The last book that you've read?

Four Faultless Felons by G.K. Chesterton. I had forgotten how much I enjoy Chesterton.

4. List five books that mean alot to you.

a. The Bible-self explanatory
b. At the Back of the North Wind by George MacDonald. This is a simply delightful, and sad book. It is filled to the brim with little pearls of wisdom.
c. Lirael by Garth Nix. I enjoyed the whole Abhorsen trilogy, but this one just really stuck with me.
d. What's Mine's Mine, by George MacDonald. It is very moralistic, but a very true description of how our lives should look as Christians.
e. The Hero and the Crown, and the Blue Sword by Robin McKinley. I just really like them.



5. Tag five people that haven't played yet
I don't know five bloggers, If I ever do, I guess I'll have to tag them.

Another day, another trip to the E.R.

The day started innocently enough....

My sister and I planned a trip to Goodwill. I was excited. Then while E. was playing with her daddy, she got hurt. She usually just shakes it off, but it was obvious she was in some discomfort. I decided to wait a couple of hours and see if she got better. Of course she didn't. So I found the nearest urgent care center to Goodwill(since we went ahead with our plans). They told me to go to the hospital since she was so little. Then I remembered an interesting tidbit of info I received when my son fractured his elbow. The hospital closest to my house will not set broken bones. You have to go to the children's hospital near downtown Atlanta. So, just in case something was broken, I gathered up my mother(because I wasn't going to drive on 400 alone) and we set off.

I must say that is was the best ER experience I have ever had. It took longer to get there than for us to be seen, diagnosed, x-rayed, fixed, and sent on our merry way. She had nursemaid's elbow. Apparently, when the dr. was examining her, the ligament that was out of whack was fixed. It was the only time she cried, and by the time we went to x-ray and back, she was perfectly normal. She started picking things up, talking(she hadn't said a word all day.) It was very weird. But I am so glad she didn't break anything. We've had enough of that for this year.

Theology and the four-year old

Since Easter my son has been trying to figure out exactly who Jesus is. For a while he would wake up in the night and want to have theological discussions about the nature of God. I am not at my best at 2:00 in the morning, but since this is important I would try to answer his questions as well as possible. After all, I was saved at his age. Since he has been attending a church sponsored Mother's Morning Out program, they talked about the Easter story. He apparently zoned out during the resurrection part of the story because he argued with me for several months that Jesus died on the cross. Period. End of Story. He was so convincing that I asked his teachers if they had told the whole story. They assured me they had. I'm not sure he still really understands, but he seems to accept the notion that Jesus is still around. He will occasionally, at random moments, ask me if Jesus or God lives in his heart. The other day at lunch we had one of these discussions. "momma, Jesus and God live in my heart." They do? I asked. When did you ask them to live in your heart? "While I was asleep. I saw them." And what did they say? I asked. "Nothing. They just stood there."

Well, I'm not sure what to make of that. He had been having bad dreams a few months ago, so we would pray that Jesus would give him nice dreams. But he was concerned that he couldn't see Jesus. So I had him pray that he would dream about Jesus. So I wonder if he did? It is so hard to tell with him. But he was so serious when he told me, I have a feeling it happened.

Then he asked, "Does God live in heaven?" Yes, God lives in heaven. He thought for a minute. "Then is heaven in my heart?"

Milestones

Yesterday I took down my daughter's crib. I didn't cry, but it was a bittersweet moment. The Crib has been up for a little over four years. The kids are close enough that we didn't have to take it down. E. (my daughter) is almost two and a half. She has been enjoying playing quietly in her brother's room and lying in his bed. So I guessed it was time for the big move. I've been delaying until I could get her a toddler bed, her room is too small for a twin, but I haven't had the funds recently to buy one. So I decided to just put her mattress on the floor. I spent a couple of hours rearranging and child proofing. The results were better than I expected. It is a sweet little girl's room. I took E. in and showed her around. She got a huge giddy grin and kept saying "my rune? my rune?" I said, "Yes, this is your room" She hopped and bounced and touched everything. I left her to play in her space. Because everyone needs their own space.

She took a nap in her new bed, but I had to lay next to her on the floor until she fell asleep. At dinner, she still had the giddy grin. We were chatting amongst ourselves when we noticed that she was trying to say something. She said momma a few times, then nigh-nigh, then fixed, until finally she took a big breath, looked at her daddy and said haltingly, "Momma feexed my nigh-nigh" (nigh-nigh is what she calls beds). She has said four-five word sentences before, but I have never seen her speak with such deliberation. She knew what she wanted to say, and worked until she got it. It was a proud moment. I did almost cry because I did something to make her happy. There is not a whole lot you can do to make a 2 yr old happy outside of cookies. for my husband's blog on this go here(it's the one called momma feexed my nigh nigh).

I am really enjoying the fact that E. talks to me. Her brother didn't start really talking until he was three. He more than made up for that yesterday. My husband gave me a new PS2 game for my birthday. So of course I have been playing. Well, for about 30 minutes yesterday P. (my son) talked non-stop asking me questions about the game. "Are you died? Did he died? Why? Why? Why? Are you done? Can you go somewhere else? Why?" etc. I finally quit playing because I couldn't handle all the questions.

Today he was playing his favorite game, Spyro the Dragon(the very first one). He is quite content to play the same level multiple times, and his game is definitely improving. But I got a big kick out of listening to his own personal commentary on the game. He would mutter an occasional "cool" or "I'm coming through"(which he got from another game that his cousin plays) and my personal favorite "I am angry"(as he flames a bad guy).

I learn the most about P. by listening to his conversations with himself. He will sit in his room in the morning and play and sing. I wonder if I will be sitting outside his room in ten years hoping to catch him being himself. I enjoy my children immensely. I really hope that in time they will learn to enjoy me.

Where does the time go

Wow, it's been a long time since I started this blog. Not too terribly much has happened, but then I started thinking about the small things.

My son managed to break his collarbone, giving us another exciting opportunity to visit the children's ER. I only waited 2 days after it happened to take him. I am such a good mother. (Actually, it happened at my mother's house and she told me he was fine. Why shouldn't I believe my mother?) But he wasn't in much pain, he just couldn't lift his arm up. It only took a couple of weeks to heal.

Thinking about what in my life could be considered an inconvenience, and that I should instead look at as an adventure led to some interesting pathways. I decided that all of motherhood could be placed under consideration. My number one(and no.2, I suppose) inconvenience would be potty training. I think my son may have the world's record for longest time spent potty training. He is a very bright child(and I have the test results to prove it), but the potty dilemma has just about undone us all. I spent the first year of training convinced I was a horrible mother and person. It seems so simple. You just go. I was on the verge of taking video to send to Dr. Phil when we had our tinkle breakthrough. We would spend 2-4 hours(yes, I said hours) in the bathroom. It was not a pleasant let's read books and sing songs kind of time together. It was plain ol' hysterics every time. And he would have to go so bad he would be in pain. For a long time I gave in, I didn't like seeing him that way. So I finally had one of my best brainstorms ever. I paid my sister $50 to get him to tinkle in the potty. She did it. It took 2 days, lots of screaming, and lots of kool-aid. That was last summer. We've had a lot of set backs. The first day of school his teacher sat him on the potty and he went all over the floor. (He was trained to stand) So for months he would not even consider sitting down because he knew he would go on the floor. It hasn't been until the past few weeks that he has decided it is ok to sit. Mostly because my dad sat in the bathroom with him for over an hour one day. But we still have to put on a diaper to do the deed. For a child as smart as he is, I just don't understand. But I finally realized it wasn't me. It's him. Ok, so it was partly me. He didn't really talk until after he turned three and never communicated his discomfort or that he needed to go, so I put off the whole ordeal until he could communicate.

What's the moral of this story. I guess it is that I should find the adventure in potty training now that my daughter(age 2) is interested. She loves the potty. Today she snuck in while her brother was tinkling and flushed. He hates that. She hasn't figured out yet that she can't stand up and go. A few days ago we were outside enjoying the weather and the kids were in their little pool when the boy had to go. His daddy showed him how to go on a tree. I wasn't sure he would do it since he is so very rigid about rules, etc, but he did. So his sister decided she needed to go. So I pulled down her diaper and she stood at the tree with her stomach thrust forward (like her brother does). Fortunately she didn't go, but her father and I had a good laugh.

The Adventure Continues

I thought the rest of my day yesterday would go well. I got a nap, I went to the grocery store, and continued my adventures by trying out the new Lime Coke. When I got home I noticed my sons eyes looked a little pink. By dinner time they were flaming red. So being the good mother I am, my husband asked me to call the doctor. They eventually got back to me two hours later and suggested I go ahead and take him to an immediate care center. At this point it was close to nine o'clock. By the time I got myself and him ready to leave( I had to wake him up) it was nine-thirty. Fortunately we live near a hospital with a children's ER/Immediate care center. Otherwise I would have had to drive to downtown Atlanta. I had really wanted to go to the fabric store last night. But I put aside my desires, and took my son to the doctor. The children's ER is a hopping place. We had a very nice Dr. She had a nose ring. So $100 later we had a prescription for some eye drops. Eckerd is also an intriguing place after 10:00. The only other person in the store was a very young guy buying personal protection. When I went out to my car I saw his girlfriend/wife waiting in his truck. I don't get out much. I felt like I was in the midst of some existential short story about a drug store. I was dragging my half asleep 4 year old, who was wearing my jacket that reached to his ankles and had flaming red eyes flowing with goop , through the store, the clerks were quietly stocking the shelves. I feel like there should be some deep meaning to the whole event, but I can't think of what it might be. I have always enjoyed going to stores late at night or early in the morning. It makes me feel like a character in a story or in a cheaply produced independent film. Needless to say, it was an adventure. The best part of my night was that my 2 yr old slept through the night for the first time in a week. She had her adenoids removed and her ear tubes replaced last week. It was outpatient surgery and she recovered well during the day. But she hasn't been sleeping well at night. As I mentioned in my last post, I require large amounts of sleep.

I wonder if my lack of refreshing sleep is what induced me to cut off all my hair. I had over 14 inches of my hair cut off last week. It was almost to my waist, now it is above my ears. Everyone likes it. I feel free. You don't think about hair being a burden, but it can be. I also realized it made my head feel cluttered, and as I am trying to eliminate the clutter from my life, I knew it had to go. I am going to donate my ponytail to locks of love. Well, if I have any more adventures today I will relate them to you, my non-existant audience. Maybe I should tell somebody I have a blog.

Too Stinking Early

I was planning on starting my blog today, but I got a much earlier start than I had hoped. This is a perfect chance to live up to my blog title. My 2 year old has been waking up periodically though the night. It would be fine if her crying wasn't quite so loud, because then I could sleep through it. I'm not sure I can come up with an accurate description of exactly how loud her cry is. But I am sure they heard it in California. Anyway, at 4:30, after getting up at 4:04, 4:16, and 4:25, I decided to go ahead and get up. Here is where I find myself tested. My first reaction to this situation is to gripe, complain, and grumble. Basically, I would consider this an inconvenience. I require large amounts of sleep to function. You may notice that sleeping is listed among my interests. But in my daily struggle to be a better person, I chose this opportunity to create my very own blog. How exciting. I have been thinking about creating one for about a year, but I figured no one would care or read it. But I am plunging forward, looking for a new adventure.

I came across the following quote the other day:

Men always talk about the most important things to perfect strangers. In the perfect stranger we perceive man himself; the image of God is not disguised by resemblance to an uncle or doubts of the wisdom of a mustache. G.K. Chesterton

This gave me the final push, and here I am. I don't have a life particularly fraught with adventure, but I think the fun comes from trying to make an adventure out of our everday living. Otherwise, we are quickly bored, and spend all our time complaining. I must confess that I find myself bored and complaining all too often. Now that I am coming out of a four year post partum induced haze, I want to be a better person, wife, mother, and christian, though not necessarily in that order. I have discovered that to be better at all these things means to be less selfish. Such a simple concept, but oh so hard to put into practice.

Well, the time has caught up to me and I am no longer thinking very coherently. I have no idea how often I will post, some days it may be many, many times, or a week may go by. My hope is to be disciplined enough to write everyday. What do I plan on talking about? I have no idea.